Tuesday, April 8, 2014

Why Do Women Hold Back Sex From The Good Guys After Sexing The Bad Ones For Years?

Good Morning Everyone! Professor JT is on the GRIND as I'm trying to get more involved with the Youth & Community of the City of Indianapolis. I had a great meeting yesterday with the Bloom Project, a Four Year Old Not-For-Profit Organization that is looking to keep 12-18 year old males engaged in learning activities and community events. It was a great opportunity to share my ideas and see what directions we could send the Bloom Project in. I was happy to be a part of such a special event and I can't wait until this Friday, when I'll be speaking to Public Allies Indianapolis on Emotional Intelligence. I give God all the Glory for these amazing opportunities to give back to my community and I'm just trying to be a part of the Good that's trying to stop the violence and make the city a better place to live. God bless everyone on today and know that GOD is waiting on YOU, to make a difference in your community today.

TONIGHT, on The Professed Word Podcast, after a week hiatus with some power outage issues down in Atlanta, we have Ms Lauryn Doll who will bless us with some great information on branding with a little bit of SEX APPEAL. You don't want to miss this amazing show tonight at 8pm est on THEPROFESSEDWORD.COM

So, I've been dating a bit and I've noticed something about a lot of Women lately, they are trying to do things DIFFERENTLY then maybe how they did it in their past. There is nothing wrong with that, but it's interesting the things that they seem to want to change as they are looking to settle down in their futures. When a lot of Women are younger, they had their "Freak Moments." Some were worse than others, but some just had more sexual freedom in their younger years and a lot of times, it wasn't with all the best guys. Maybe it was their TYPE and the Sex was amazing. They knew it may not turn into a marriage or they were giving time for the guy to get himself together, but for some reason, they never worked out together. They kicked it with who they wanted, when they wanted, HOW THEY WANTED! Videos, toys, sexual acts in different places and in all kinds of difference positions. After a while, when people started to get married and settle down, they started to wonder if maybe they need to do things differently in order to keep a Man. So, a Good Man comes along and all of a sudden, all the sex & sexual acts STOP! Is this necessarily a BAD THING or a GOOD THING? Were the Bad Guy's Needs more important to be met than the Good Guy's Needs? Is putting a lock on the sexual activity going to make a Man want to commit more to a Woman? These are my questions today and I'm wondering, are these great practices?

Withholding Sex from a Man in means to try to get him is never a good idea Ladies. If you are trying to do different, don't do it because you may be trying to get him. The Freak in you never goes away. The Man that you're keeping it from more than likely is going to get what you're not giving him from someone else. I always feel like there is at least one man that has a Woman's number and vice versa. We all have those 1-2-3 people who we know we have to stay away from because if we get alone with them for too long, some how our clothes end up off. If a Woman or even a Man has taken a vow or celibacy or to not do any sexual activity at all, that's different. Withholding or Giving Sex to another person will not keep them regardless! You have to do what's best for you. And if ANYTHING, if you are turning over a new leave in your sex life, NEVER bring up your past freaky escapades. It's probably best that you get rid of your past pictures, videos, ect because letting your current know about your past freaky tails may not make him feel very good as a Man as you now have become a Nun. LOL! Also, is the Freak going to come back out when you get married? What if you got so used to not doing anything sexual anymore with this person, that you completely stop? Is that fair to the Man that all the bad guys got that side of you and he never will? Just some observations I have seen in dating lately. If a Woman wants to hold back sexually, that's fine. A Woman or a Man shouldn't start out sexually then pump the brakes in a relationship either, that sends people mixed messages. You know what you want out of your relationship. Give your best and what y'all do is between you two! Leave the past behind and enjoy who you are with to the fullest! You don't want to hold back from the right one because you may be setting yourself up to lose them. 


Shemica Cunningham said...

First of all thank you for acknowledging the fact that women may actually be trying to change. I think that as women mature they learn to truly value themselves. when this happens you realize that you have a choice of who you want to sleep with, and you define the criteria for such a relationship. So the good guy comes along and he hasn't quite met the new criteria that this woman has set for herself so he has to either wait until he does or move on. If he doesn't want to wait then he wasn't the one for her. I don't think either party male or female should discuss their past freak phases...all that should matter is that you are coming into the relationship a sexually healthy person. What happens in the future is just that the future...the past shouldn't be an issue. Whatever freakiness I may posses will be shared with a man once he has met my criteria in earning said freakiness.

Shemica Cunningham said...

Congratulations on all the exciting things you have going on right now. I'm really proud of you. Keep up the good work!


Blessings to you Ms Shemica and I give God all the Glory for what He is allowing me to do here in the City of Indianapolis!

I think it's interesting that you say "Criteria" must be met. I don't think Men or Women should have to be tested just to get loved on. I'm sure they didn't test everyone that came their way in their past before they sexed them down. I think if agreements are made in the beginning, then that's a good think on what direction the relationship should go sexually. It should never be a person feels slighted because the person they are with isn't sharing themselves sexually because when they did in their past, the relationship didn't work. It's all up to the couple's I say, but Sex with a past person should never effect what happens with future ones. - Professor JT

Shemica Cunningham said...

It's not about being "tested" rather grown people having standards...their standards have evolved as they have matured...when they were younger...it may have as simple as he has a job, a car, and took me to red lobster...he can hit...once you mature...it takes more than that! I don't think the reason women aren't having sex with the new man is as simple as it didn't work with the last man. I would like to think women are making these choices based on a new level of maturity. That's all.

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